Mental health is more than the absence of illness – it’s about feeling balanced, resilient, and capable of managing life’s ups and downs. Taking care of your mental well-being isn’t just about avoiding burnout or managing stress – it’s about actively nurturing yourself so that you can thrive emotionally, mentally, and physically. Self-care provides the foundation for mental resilience by helping you manage stress, regulate emotions, and maintain a sense of balance in an increasingly complex world.
Yet, with so many ideas floating around about what self-care “should” look like, it’s easy to feel like we’re doing it wrong or not doing enough.
The truth is, self-care is highly personal. Just like we each have a unique way of communicating love or coping with stress, we each have a self-care language: a way of caring for ourselves that actually supports our (mental) health. Finding yours can make the difference between just another obligation and something that genuinely restores and helps you feel like yourself again.
The truth is, self-care is highly personal. Just like we each have a unique way of communicating love or coping with stress, we each have a self-care language: a way of caring for ourselves that actually supports our (mental) health. Finding yours can make the difference between just another obligation and something that genuinely restores and helps you feel like yourself again.
What Is Self-Care, Really?
Pop culture has a tendency to shrink self-care down to candles, face masks, and the occasional skipped social event. While those things can absolutely be part of your routine, self-care goes a bit deeper than aesthetics or escaping your life. According to psychologists, self-care includes any activity that helps maintain or improve your physical, emotional, or psychological health – and, importantly, your mental well-being.Taking care of yourself is about finding ways to return your system to a state of safety, happiness and wholeness. Research shows that people who consistently engage in self-care experience better emotional regulation, stronger coping skills, lower levels of anxiety and depression, and improved overall mental health. Self-care is not just a reaction to stress—it’s a proactive tool to strengthen your mental health, build resilience, and maintain long-term well-being.
What Is a Self-Care Language?
The idea of a “self-care language” takes inspiration from the concept of love languages and the theory that different people give and receive love in different ways. Similarly, your self-care language is the unique combination of habits, rituals, or actions that help you feel grounded, restored, and mentally well.Not everyone recharges the same way. Some people feel better after talking things through with a friend who really gets them. Others need movement to feel energized or a quiet hour alone to reset. By identifying the type of care that resonates most with you, you can build a routine that feels intuitive rather than forced and supports your mental health consistently.
Types of Self-Care Languages
Below are five categories of self-care. You might connect with one more than the others, or find that you need a combination depending on the season of life you’re in. Feel free to pick and choose… this is a toolbox, not a checklist.1. Physical Self-Care: Listening to Your Body
This one covers the basics: movement, rest, nourishment, and physical maintenance. That means not just working out for the sake of fitness goals, but also listening to what your body genuinely needs and giving it that. Be it exercise, sleep, hydration, or nourishing foods – all are equally vital and often overlooked.If stretching, getting a full night’s sleep, or eating a home-cooked meal helps you feel more grounded, this might be your self-care sweet spot.
Examples:
2. Emotional Self-Care: Making Space for Your Feelings
Emotional self-care means tuning into your feelings and allowing yourself to experience them without judgment. It involves practices that help you process emotions, set boundaries, and practice self-compassion.Psychologists have shown that self-compassion coupled with self-awareness leads to greater emotional resilience, helping people recover more quickly from stress and setbacks.
If you’re most able to return to peace and balance when you talk things out, reflect privately, or simply acknowledge your feelings, emotional self-care may be your go-to.
Examples:
3. Social Self-Care: Seeking Connection
Humans are inherently social creatures, and meaningful relationships are a core part of mental and emotional health. Social self-care isn’t really about being around people all the time, but rather intentionally connecting with those who truly support you. Research consistently links strong social support to better outcomes in managing stress, improving mood, and even enhancing physical health.If you feel the most energized after spending time with friends and family, then keep the concept of social self-care in your back pocket for the next time your mental health needs a boost.
Examples:
4. Intellectual Self-Care: Stimulating Your Mind
For some people, self-care needs to involve engaging the brain. Intellectual self-care is all about curiosity, learning, and mental stimulation. It can also include creativity, diving deep into an interest, or problem-solving, all of which provide a healthy outlet for stress and promote a sense of achievement and fulfillment.If puzzles, podcasts, books, or creative projects help you reset mentally and emotionally, this one may be for you.
Examples:
5. Environmental Self-Care: Creating Supportive Spaces
Your surroundings affect your mood more than you might think. Environmental self-care means curating your physical space to help you feel calm, focused, and more like yourself. Studies in environmental psychology show that organized, clean, and aesthetically pleasing spaces can reduce stress and improve focus.If tidying your home, decorating your workspace, or reducing visual clutter lifts your mood and mental clarity, you may thrive in this self-care language.
Examples:
How to Discover Your Self-Care Language
Your self-care language is often hiding in plain sight, already woven into your habits, your cravings, your reactions. If you’re not sure, try experimenting. Notice how different activities leave you feeling afterward. Recharged? Grounded? Great, keep it. Numb or drained? Probably not your thing.The five items above are just examples: you might also experiment with different forms of care and notice how you feel afterward. If something leaves you more stressed, it’s probably not right for you. Self-care should restore, not deplete.
Remember: self-care is not a replacement for professional mental health support. If you notice persistent sadness, anxiety, or difficulty functioning, reaching out to a mental health professional is essential.
Make It Sustainable
The key to effective self-care is consistency. You don’t need to carve out an entire day or spend a lot of money to take care of yourself. A few minutes of something intentional, done regularly, can be more powerful than a full spa day you only do once a year.Start small. Identify one practice that feels like it fits and build around it when you can. Over time, these small actions compound, creating a stronger, more supportive foundation for everything else in your life.
And remember: self-care is not about perfection. It’s about listening, adjusting, and responding to your needs with kindness. When you start understanding your self-care language, you give yourself the tools to thrive, not just today but every day.
Celebrate international Self-Care Day!
Every year on October 10, people around the world recognize World Mental Health Day, a reminder that taking care of your mental health isn’t a bonus or a reward. It’s essential. It’s essential.On World Mental Health Day, give yourself permission to pause and ask, “What do I need right now?” Whether your answer is movement, rest, connection, or stimulation, honoring that need is a powerful act of respect toward yourself.
Key visual: Eva Pruchova/Shutterstock.com
Kristine Mitchell is a freelance journalist whose work explores global culture, creative expression and patterns she observes in the world around her.
WELLBEING & SELF-CARE
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